How to talk about end of life: lessons from the Indian American Impact Summit

At the 2025 Indian American Impact Summit, Jaspreet Chowdhary, Senior Legislative Counsel at Compassion & Choices joined a panel exploring cross-generational leadership, caregiving, and how South Asians are showing up at every age to mobilize and care for their communities. Within that wider discussion, Compassion & Choices contributed a practical lens: how can families begin and sustain values-aligned conversations about end of life.

Starting these conversations can be difficult, but Jaspreet’s first step is candor. She recommends explaining why this matters: “I want to make sure I respect your wishes and I am scared about what to do when the time comes. I know this is scary and uncomfortable, but could we start talking…”

These conversations can feel daunting and overwhelming. Jaspreet suggests reframing them as acts of love: “I want this to be a continuation of your story and an expression of our love for each other.” That shift can reduce the intimidation factor and help people open up. Just as important: treat planning as ongoing, not a one-time discussion. “If things get tense or uncomfortable, it is okay to pause and return to the topic later,” Jaspreet adds.

María Otero, Director of Priority Populations, noted that a major theme of the Summit was building visibility and trust with communities shaping policy and advocacy. It was encouraging to see how much recognition Compassion & Choices has in these spaces, “people know who we are, which opens doors for deeper conversations about end-of-life care equity.” 

The Summit also created several connections with community-based organizations serving these populations, opening pathways for future engagement and education. A highlight: welcoming members of our AANHPI Leadership Council to participate in the conference for the first time, giving staff and leadership council members meaningful time together.

By approaching these discussions with intentionality and compassion, we can ensure that everyone has the opportunity to live and die according to their own values.

Try this at home: three ways to start an end-of-life conversation this week

1. Lead with love. Tell your parent, partner, or friend that you want to honor their wishes and values.
2. Make it ongoing. Treat it as a series of smaller talks, pause if emotions rise, and come back later.
3. Use a guide. Download the End-of-Life Decisions Guide and Toolkit to document preferences together.